By Eliza Wing
Don't blame us for that headline -- it's one of the Buddha's first teachings. Upon his awakening, the buddha taught that we could not ignore the inevitable -- aging, sickness, death - and that freedom is to be found in how we relate to our suffering. In fact, denying or fighting against our human nature and the disappointments in life only further our suffering. In our work, we meet many individuals who want a way to alleviate their stress and suffering. Truth is, there is no magic formula. There is, though, true freedom
We can hear it already.. “so you are telling me that life generally sucks and I have to be okay with that?” That’s not what we mean. Here’s the thing. Everything changes all the time. Sometimes we hit a nice, stable period. Say, for example, everyone we love is healthy and generally happy, we are financially stable and our work is satisfying. It only takes one phone call for that to get taken away. Someone gets sick. You lose a contract.
These are real difficulties. Frankly, they are small potatoes compared to people suffering violence, war, discrimination. Still, they are challenging and not to be shrugged off.
So, what does one do in the face of change and difficulty?
Again, it’s not just one thing ( an answer which can be disappointing to our clients and students). Our approach is holistic and encompasses all aspects of life. Our main perspective is that we need to learn how to be strong and healthy in the face of change. We need practices that provide resilience. When we work with people, we look at the Whole Self. We look at diet and it’s impact on mental health. We look at physical practices that relieve pain and engender calm. We offer guidance in meditation (which may seem like the most mindless part of all. How does sitting still every day and observing thoughts actually help? This may be our next book. :)) We teach practices that help moderate the systems we usually consider out of our control through breath work and energy work. We help clarify purpose because we know a life lived without purpose and clarity is dull and disappointing. Most of all, we know that every single person that we encounter has within them the makings of a whole and free human being.
There is no fatal flaw or, to borrow a term that has wreaked more havoc than we will ever truly know — there is no Original Sin. We were all born pure.
Developing these practices and the ensuing resilience feeds confidence and allows us the space and capacity to go even further - to develop compassion and love. That in turn sets us free. When we get past the “I wish” “I should” and rest in the real, true nature of our changing, frustrating human existence, we can rest in the understanding that, in the end, love is what connects everything.
And we can learn how to live in love, not separate from it. Which is freedom (and so amazing).
Come work with us. We’d love to help.